Gotta LOVE Oh, What a Night!

   Yesterday, our meditation was about LOVE. Four little letters with a huge meaning. Love for ourselves and for those around us and the importance of never trying to expect anyone to be other than what they are. Their truest self. If you have genuine love for somone, celebrate them. In my favorite movie "Great Expectations", Estella says, "We are who we are. People don't change." I think there is always room for improvement in us all. However, we can ony do that for ourselves and lead by example. "Be the change you wish to see in the world", Ghandi said. If people see a change in you, or a life that they admire, you have already inspired them to take action. My favorite quote and how I approach the people I love the most in my life is: "Expect nothing. Accept everything." Accept and love them in every way you know how and expect nothing in return...that way, everything is of the greatest surprise.

   After meditation, we cleaned up some dance numbers before attempting our first run through!
I was blown away by the talent in the room of the "Oh, What a Night!" cast. Sonoma is going to be blown away next week. We have everything in this concert - tap dancing, pop music medleys, comic duets, heart wrenching ballads, kooky up tempos... no matter what you want to hear, it will all be there.

   A run through is always daunting the first time. There are so many blanks to fill in! As many times as I have gone through a rehearsal process in my lifetime, I still get nervous for the first run through. Actors put a lot of pressure on themselves to be perfect. Perfect doesn't exist. Amy Miller, the artistic director of Transcendence Theatre Company, always remind us "4%" - Meaning, we will improve little by little. Progress can be made each time just by a simple 4%. It really takes the pressure off.
I passed out some Artist Way cards to each member of the cast. They have one word reminders such as: Find the Magic, Support, Art is a Process... basic reminders that I thought everyone would like to take into the run through with them. I have already gushed about how fantastic the show was and we still have a week before an audience shows up! It was a fully lived day for sure! Cocktails in the square, anyone? I said yes to dinner at the Swiss Hotel. Their signature glarify (pronounced glare-if-ee) is a basic irish coffee - but their secret recipe. It was delish. Then, a glass of savvy b to go with my seared ahi tuna. A dark and rustic restaurant that makes you feel like you are in the wild west was the perfect way to relax after such a highly intense rehearsal.

   I drove back to Glen Ellen as the sun set in Sonoma. I took in all of the vineyards as I passed and was so grateful for this entire day, this experience, and feeling so fufilled watching my incredible cast share their talents. Everyone has a moment in their particular element. What I love about this compnay is that there is no star of the show. Everyone shines in their own way and at their own moment. With every number I thought, this might be my favorite...no, this might be my favorite.... well, they are all favorites. This is the concert that doesn't quit!! Get ready, Sonoma!! Here comes: "Oh, What a Night!"

xoxo
Her LadyMess

Lyrics, lyrics everywhere...

Have you ever been falling for someone and every lyric seems to jump out at you from the radio or resonate with your experience? Mph. I love that I get to sing things out loud so that even if I can't say them, in some way, I can express them. One of the beautiful things about being a performer is self-expression. Perhaps the lyrics mean different things to you, the audience, than they do for me...but you feel something in your own way that hits home. It is a different experience each time, each performance for us all depending what our day has been like. or where we are at in our life circumstances... Here was my rehearsal day and the lyrics that made me stop, think, and share a private part of myself that otherwise would have remained quiet...

Jekyll and Hyde:
But if some like you, found someone like me, then suddenly nothing would ever be the same.... my heart takes wing, and I'd feel so alive...if someone like you found me...

Whitney Houston Medley:

There's a boy I know, he's the one I'm dreaming of. 

Looks into my eyes, takes me to the clouds above. 

And I lose control can't seem to get enough.

When I wake from dreamin', tell me is it really love.

OOOOOOO

How will I know?

How will I know?

How will I know if he really loves me? I say a prayer with every heart beat.

I fall in love whenever we meet...

I'm asking you cause you know about these things.

How will I know if he's thinking of me?

I try the phone, but I'm too shy can't speak.

Falling in love is so bittersweet.

This love is strong, why do I feel weak? If he loves me?

oh, How will I know?

It was an exhausting day of putting moves to music... and then when I was able to say these things out  loud, it felt freeing. 

#Son-HOME-a

#yeswhitney

#nothingwilleverbethesame

xoxo, 

Her Ladymess

Sent from my iPad

Attention flows where attention goes...

"Energy flows where attention goes."
 This was our focus today. The day began with a 20 minute guided meditation by the lovely Shannon O'Bryan. I have done guided meditation before - usually for ten minutes... I have such an odd relationship with time and the "go go go" of New York City energy that being silent for 20 minutes seemed daunting. I cannot wait to greet this practive daily and see that shift of peace in myself.
 We circled up with the entire cast after that and greeted each other with such a present energy... I was all rehearsals began this way. What I do know is I am building a practive to take with me... if I ever leave. (Good luck with that, Sonoma! I'm staying!)
 It is impossible not to get swept up by the beauty of this place. For such a long time, I am have been in a serious relationship with NYC. I am surprising myself with what charms me about Sonoma. The lush greenery of the vineyards, the support and love of the community, the charm of everyone knowing you when you walk into the Glenn Ellen Market (my daily juice of beets, apple, lemon, parlsley, ginger...so addicted...).
 Tomorrow is the day off... I plan on hiking with a few folks at a park an hour away with the promise of seeing elk...WHAT?? Never seen that in NYC or in Kansas for that matter! Then, perhaps a picnic in the dog park, and a family style dinner collected from our gardens paired with a few bottles of vino telling tales of the week we have shared and what is to come. This place has my heart!

#corkbag

#homesweethomehoodie

Vineyard Viewing.. another day at work ;)

Vineyard viewing party!! You know it's a tough day at work when you and your co-workers just have to visit four wineries as possible venues for company events. Each one so special and glorious in their  own way. You can't even believe the history that all of these vineyards have. Why wasn't this taught as high school history?? I think I would have been a lot more interested!!

Little Cellars was first up and I couldn't get passed Rona, a sweet bog 'ol ball of love in the form of a dog. She won all of our hearts over for sure. The view was glorious and the patio will be making memories for us all summer long. I can't wait to see the lake out back. We shall return. Thanks for the tour, Joan! (And Rona!)


 Chateau St. Jean Prounounced Jean - like blue jeans. Not John. JEEEEAAAAANN. Like saying "tarjay" when it's target. Don't be fancy ;) The Chateu feels like a party at Gatsby's house. White lights hanging from the trees and steps up to the main tasting room that reek of elegance.They owner thanked us for coming and what did this ladymess do? I thanked him for their Chardonnay. I couldn't help myself! Seriously, a delight if you have never tried it. Not overtly buttery - but as crisp and elegants at the Chateu itself. Now, I'm thirsy ;)




Next, we headed to St. Anne's where the tasting room lead us to a charming backyard patio. Very intimate and shaded by big beautiful trees. Scott from St. Anne's ws sweet enough to bring us all a tasting if their Zinfandel. Juicy and earthy and a rich delicious nose. I savored every last bit as the sun and light wind were a perfect combination of making a lovely afternoon heavanly. Then, the ever so generous Scott gave us a taste of this year's rose. 100% with a spicy finish that I would have thought to be black pepper...but it was NUTMEG. NUTMEG??? IT made this Meg NUTS for sure. Knocked my socks off. Don't miss that delicious treat!






Our last stop on the tour was Muscardini. This is one of my favorite spots from last year in Sonoma. Family owned and uber friendly. While we didn't taste the wines there this particular day, I remember having the privelage to taste directly from the barrel last summer. Well, they put it in my glass. I wasn't under the barrel going to town on the aging process :) I'll be back Muscardini!

 What better way to finish the day than to pow wow at the Farmer's Market in Sonoma Square? Every Tuesday the town gathers in the square and local vendors sell their food, fruits, veggies, crafts, and creations. A band played as we set down two big blankets, popped open our vino, and took in the rest of the glorious sun as it was quickly setting. We chatted about life and it's vast possibilites. Other members of our company joined in as time went on and I just took and deep, present moment breath feeling so lucky to be here and have these people around me... and we've only just begun.
 Guess what local celebrity was also there? Peepers, Margie's bar chicken from Community Cafe! I would know that chicken anywhere and even got to give a big 'ol hug to Margie. She's a gem!

 Sonoma sun sets and I joined a friend for a nosh at the Girl and the Fig and drove home on the winding roads loving such well lived and full days. #bestdyever

Finding the Blue Bird of Happiness: My time in Sonoma

Oui! Oui! The Gaultier Exhibit!

New York, I love you. A terrible day of weather, but I can always find inspiration somewhere to brighten my mood. A quick text to a pal and a jump on the subway and we have landed at the Brooklyn Museum to view the Gaultier exhibit in it's final days. A glass of Malbec and an espresso shot at Saul's (Charming!) and then to view! (Meaning to see, not meaning "The View" where women bark to see who can get their opinion across the loudest... I prefer Kathy Lee and Hoda...but that's also because they are hilarious booze hounds!)

  So, I wanted to share this gentleman's incredible perspective on beauty, perfection, differences that make us unique and how he expressed that in his vision. This man was behind Madonna's cone boobage and there were so many stunning visuals of how he juxtaposed the pretty, the ugly, the kooky all to make a very sexy and intriguing exhibit. I don't so burrough typically, as I am Manhattan Meggie, but this was worth it:


"I respect individualities, and I like particularities. I mix and match, collect, twist, and crossbreed codes. Past, present, here, elsewhere, masculine, feminine, remarkable, humdrum- it all coexists." - John Paul Gaultier

This and many of the models and moving faces that were projected onto the faces. It made them so personable. You saw the joie de vivre of John Paul through his work as opposed to the dark and ominous personal of the McQueen exhibit. 

 This one came alive and was singing opera music. Set with that backdrop of New York City streets and it just screamed tres chic. Especially with the pleasing palates of creams, champagnes, texture, and lace... I was in lady heaven. Don't you think this should be my front room?? Hollywood glam style: 

"Our body, the way we present ourselves- it's a form of communication. Our clothing, hair, and body decoration reflect our true identity."- JPG

"Perfection is relative and beauty is subjective. I wanted to make imperfection admirable. Sometimes a different energy and bearing or an unusual type of body catches my eye and makes me want to invent something..." -JPG

Now this is what I call a cap and gown. I would have shown up to my graduation if I got to look this charming. Full lady business. I'm obsessed. 

 These are only a few of my favorites from the exhibit, but it was worth sharing his message. We all have this ideal of who we want to be when we "grow up" and putting on a face to say that all is well and good, but the beauty is in the mess, sweet friends. It is the hard lessons that teach us the most and the universe gives you the exact lessons you need for change and growth. Though change and growth are never easy, we must keep placing one foot in from of the other and greet each day as a clean slate. Commit to yourself and your well being. Show up for yourself. You are worth it. If you don't, no one else will. 

xoxo
Her LadyMess

Lessons from Disney's Frozen

A couple of nights ago I was asked on a date to go an see "Frozen". Now, you know me, I LIVE for Disney. But this wasn't just a movie. It was a sing-a-long version. GULP. It may surprise you that most singers do not enjoy activities such a karaoke or sing a longs... or being asked impromptu to sing at Grandma Eleanor's birthday party... It puts us in a spotlight we didn't choose to be in and it feel uncomfortable. Not wanting to be a lame date, I went along with it. It was actually pretty darling. A five year old was belting out tunes with her father and a group of friends in their 30's had their arms up singing and giggling. Leave it to Disney to consistently trump itself in the magic they create in this world!

My date sang a long a bit and tried to get me too. That probably wasn't going to happen... but seeing the joy in the room made me enjoy it all the more.

Also, the lyrics resonated with my and where I am at in my life. Take a gander:

Don't let them in, don't let them see.

Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know.
Well, now they know!

Let it go, let it go!
Can't hold it back any more.
Let it go, let it go!
Turn away and slam the door.
I don't care what they're going to say.
Let the storm rage on.

The cold never bothered me anyway.

It's funny how some distance,
makes everything seem small.
And the fears that once controlled me, can't get to me at all
It's time to see what I can do,
to test the limits and break through.
No right, no wrong, no rules for me.
I'm free!

Let it go, let it go.
I am one with the wind and sky.
Let it go, let it go.
You'll never see me cry.
Here I'll stand, and here I'll stay.
Let the storm rage on.

   I haven't been able to control much about my surroundings and things happening in my life. We all have our issues to deal with and have to learn how to ride the inevitable wave. Life will take you up and down and toss you from side to side in the good, the bad, the unexpected, and you need to have a sense of self worth at your core. Not only that, but a self awareness to treat yourself well,. You can't expect other people to do it for you. That is why I keep my journal within reach, or have a book or podcast to get something positive in my ear. It is about knowing how to take care of you.

 You know what I liked most about "Frozen"? In the end, it wasn't about romantic love, it was about the bond of sisters. My five year old little friend even yelled out during "Love is an Open Door ":   He isn't even her true love!" Smart cookie... I have things to learn from that precious nugget!

We are always learning aren't we? Every moment is an opportunity to learn. It might be from a movie, it might be from a five year old... in New York, the constant dealing with people's energy can try and test you every single day. It is finding patience to let those lessons come in, resonate with you, and improve your perspective. 

Even though I didn't belt out the big number in front of my date, I still left the movie inspired. I want to "Let it Go!" As Idina Menzel so brilliantly belts, " Let it go! Let it go! That perfect girl is gone!" I don't think perfect should even be in the dictionary as it is not a real world. Perfection is an illusion. I'm not going to hide under an assumed facade. Scars and all are what make us interesting and unique. We each have our own journey and no one gets there an easier. Be kind to yourselves and to those around you. 

You know not what they may be going through.

xoxo

Her LadyMess

Wine Down Wednesday

Wine down Wednesday! Yesterday was national drink wine day! I'm sorry??? No one prepared me! Thank goodness I had plenty of birthday booze to choose from! My friends CLEARLY know I am a Jesus Juicer as I received three wine glasses and 6 bottles of wine total. I had plenty to choose from yesterday! I was given some favorites Cakebread (the magical Chardonnay which is cleaner than most California Chardonnays. You know me and my buttery creamy delicious Chardonnays. I have reviewed the Cakebread before on Her LadyMess as well as another delightful birthday juice I received, the Conundrum blend, oooooo and the Cupcake Red Velvet... So, I won't go back over them. I'll just give them a slow clap, standing ovation from right here in my NYC apartment :)
New bottles given to taste test:

 I have always been a big fan of this Oregon pinot gris. When I was in Portland doing the world premiere of Somewhere in Time we clearly made it to wine country and this vineyard was beautiful. I was thrilled that my pal was so thoughtful to want to try an Oregan Chardonnay with me! This Chardonnay, again not Cali butter style as it was unoaked. It was very smooth and delightfully fruity (Just like Mario Cantone without the side of sass!) Definite notes of lemon and lime coming through with another type of stone fruit... kiwi perhaps? Sounds random but it was refreshing enough that I considered it my hydration for the day :)
 I would get this as a gift for someone who is a Savvy B fan in a heart beat if you want to change their minds about Chardonnay!

Who has ever met a Malbec from Argentina they didn't like??? Always the perfect gift for a red wine enthusiast and a palate pleaser across the board. Typical Malbecs are flavored just as it is colored: plummy, dark cherry, berry flavored with just a hint of smoke and grit to make it a full bodied glass of deliciousness. I know it doesn't sound great when you are describing something going into your system in a similar family as dirt, but trust me.  Malbecs are stellar and cost effective. The Trapiche needed a bit of time to open up or a decanter might have helped. I found it led with the smoke and grit and the fruits were dry and opposed to luscious. It seemed that this particular brand was backward in how you want a Malbec to feel. 

Fun fact: A Cahor is a french version of a Malbec. Kind of sounds like a  red-headed french prostitute...). Awkward.

What would a party be without some bubbly? Or Pro-sexy as I like to call it. If you are going to make me drink champs, which I am not usually a big bubbles advocate (and I'm not talking about my boob-age... my family called me Bubbles during puberty and I never could let it go...TMI!) then let's make it prosecco. An Italian version of Champagne, delightfully inexpensive, and it delightful with a few frozen berries in it :) Not to mention pretty! Very pale in color and light on the palate. This would be great for a pinot grigio lover if they want to try something different. You know how I feel about the PG (pinot grigio...not pregnancy...give up the jesus juice for 9 months?? NOOOOOOOOO. I'm only KIND OF kidding...)

Cheers,
 xoxo
Her LadyMess

Nothing goes better with your morning coffee and a side of Pomeranian unless you count an excellent read! I love making a reading. The perfect balance of scripts, self help, fiction, non-fiction. I can never do a male protagonist ... sounds odd, I know. What can I say?  I like my lady business and I have attempted "man books" enough to know that it isn't for me.  

But here is what I will be reading over the next couple of months:

1) Rediscovering Catholicism:

I was raised catholic but have been a spiritual seeker my entire life. All in all, I think the big picture, it is about being a better human being. There is something greater out there than us. We all call it something different, but exist under the same ideal. I am interested to see if this book aligns with the principles in my next choice...

2) The Myth of Freedom

A book given to me by my friend and inspired soul Neil. He got me started on the meditation path back in college. We are making a book club out of it and touching base once a week. The book is centered around practicing mindfulness. We could all use a daily dose of that don't you think? 

The next few are choices based on a lady book and movie club I am in. Props to Jenna for saying even if you don't read the book (which I won't if it is a man club novel...barf nation), it doesn't matter, you can still join the ladies at the movie. You should do it with your ladies too! Here is the list of fantastic books being turned into movies this year: http://www.buzzfeed.com/ariellecalderon/books-to-read-before-they-hit-theaters-this-year 

3) Divergent

I like that my friend, Blair, picked this. She was strong in saying she had no interest in "A Winter's Tale". Post Valentine's Day, I get it. Instead, she chose a novel that is a warrior of the heart novel! I am anxious to see how it compares to Hunger Games. I'm GAME. (See what I did there...hehe)

4)  Gone Girl

I've been hearing about this since it came out! Now that is will be a movie, it was the perfect incentive to finally read it. Since I am not a kindle fan (WHO DOESN'T LIKE TO TURN PAGES?!?!?), I am lugging around the hard cover copy.

5) A Long Way Down

Oh goody a kill yourself delight. Once reading the description, I decided to put this towards the "tale" end of my list. Looks good... but I am going to need a bit more sunshine before delving into this sucker.

6) South Pacific Script

The next is a script of a show that I will be doing in the spring. I always like to read the script ahead of time and get started on lyric work as I am a "cotton headed ninny muggins (That's right. I'll reference "Elf") and I need all the practice I can get... and maybe some ginkgo biloba tea. Ew sick. I just said tea. I take it back! Coffee, yes. Tea? Boo. Vino? WAHOO! I digress...

7) Paradise Rewritten

This is research work for "South Pacific". The cool part about being an actor is that every show is a new beginning and a chance to learn new things, new cultures, new time eras. I love to make a study out of it. Makes me feel like a school girl again :)  

So, make your lists, people! Assign them to yourself. I am implementing reading at night before I get to bed so my anxiety brain starts training itself to fall asleep! Also, I love supporting used book stores and sellers from Amazon.com when I buy a copy of a book. Not only do they contain a story as a book, they also have a history of being read a shared. Love that <3 <3 <3

xoxo

Her LadyMess

She's back in action, Lady love!

 I feel like I am coming back into myself. I went into hiding for awhile and now I am ready to emerge in full force again... As a BLONDE! I rocked the red for awhile, but let's be honest: Blondes do have more fun! What do you think?

 I was feeling the weight of the world there for awhile. Life comes at you and you don't always know how to combat it. People also don't think it is acceptable to talk about Depression, but it is real and you have to know how to combat it. I watched the light go out of my eyes for months and didn't know how to get myself back together. Then, as I was about to turn 30, something shifted and I was ready for CHANGE. Sometimes a simple change of hair color will turn a new leaf! Small changes are good too. I promised myself for my birthday I would HYDRATE. For Pete's sake (No, he was not a recent okStupid Date) I never drank water! Wanting to be kind to my skin and new hair, I have made the commitment of 8 glasses a day like a good girl.
 Other changes? A beauty routine day and night that I am excited about. My best friend Blair got me Birchbox for Christmas and I must say I am addicted. I love trying new products and seeing a change! I was never a sample queen before but this is the BEST GIFT EVER. Seriously, get into it. Even for those that are hard to please! Also for Christmas, I got the Clairsonic Facial brush and it is exfoliation to the max! I have no more dry winter skin! Only a brighter complexion that I can feel proud of. (God bless the ladies in my life!) I believe my mom said : "Well, you and your father have very prominent pores."  Thank you??? (QUESTION MARK??) She keeps it real, that gal.

I have been trying to find my way back to that girl who was driven and had dreams that no one could say no to. I have lived in New York, accomplished goals that I had set for myself back in high school... and now what ? I want to be FEARLESS. We all say that and then rarely do anything about it. So, since my 30th birthday, my gift to myself is OWNING IT, I am proud of who I am and what I have to offer this world.

This journal has been through a lot. So have I. They are always so telling of the time period I have been witness to. But no more witness. It is time to be the leading character in my life and own my story. Yesterday, for the first time in a long time, I collaged and wrote pages and pages. I have been so stifled emotionally that I could barely get half a page out in the past few months. It felt good to purge!

It was time for me to come around again. Pages from my collaging: 

It is the year of the journey. The "Healing Card" that I pulled that week was "RELEASE". I thought I had done that enough this week, but listening to the universe, I accepted the card. I have had emotional release, physical release (as I got my buns to the gym for class all week!), and verbal with my journal pages. This was the motto that forced me into action: 

Balance or bust, my friends. We have no other choice!

So thank you 30 for kicking me into gear instead of being a wallowing sad sack. Life is what we make of it. It takes perspective, goal making, and forward motion. Don't get stagnant. "The only thing consistent in life is CHANGE." So get on board with that mentality and make your changes positive to your life style. YOU CAN DO IT. 

Make a wish, my friends! To nailing this decade: 

XOXO,

 Her LadyMess

 I woke up way too early today and didn't quite know how to fill my time. Sundays are meant to be lazy, I realize. But, I hate having too much time on my hands. This is why I am a lover of a to do list! Keeps me accountable and on track!

 I decided to get into some Oprah Soulful Sundays and watch a few videos from a few spiritual gurus and found it a bit more inspirational that the Catholic Mass I attended this morning. I love spiritual conversation as opposed to going through the motions of routine. Everyone goes about it differently and I respect that. I am also thankful that I can choose what works for me as well.  I also did a few activities on Soul Pancake. Ever hear of it? I did the essays such as What is your Ultimate Cool?, Make Three Titles for Yourself, Write a Haiku, and What  Kind of Pie would you be?

Check it out: 

http://soulpancake.com/activities

  I write them all in my journal and even decided to post two of them just for to challenge myself. Who cares if people judge! Just put yourself out there. YOU ARE VALID!

Soul Pancake allowed me to swallow two bits of advice :
No apologies for being me and self acceptance is the key!
Thanks for helping me get to a better day, Soul Pancake!

Now I am meeting my gal pal for a boozy brunch (New Yorker's favorite especially on a beautiful day such as this!) and then headed to the Whitney Museum for the exhibits of Blues for Smoke, Jay Defeo (bring on the White Rose!!) , and American Legends: From Calder to O'Keefe (don't make it dirty...) I have never been to the Whitney Museum in my time in NYC and I think today is the day. Especially it being FREE.

'Tis the Lord's Day! So, drink his juice! (No, you can't have any of mine!)
xoxo
Her LadyMess

Ummmmmm... this is an e-mail from a friend of mine that I woke up to! Since I posted about my new love, the color champagne, I thought this would be fun to share!

Find at : Fab.com!

I replied, "I may not like to drink it, but I'll sit on cork any day!" Don't make it dirty! ;)
But, Her LadyMess woud preger to sit here. Amongst the wine corks that have made majic,memories, and let's e honest, a few mistakes. I wish I had saved all of my corks so I could make a personalized one composed of buttery Chardonnays with Jen, Malbecs with Alaina, Fuso with Blair, Bogle with my sis and Aunt C, Nobilo with Kasey, Savvy B's with Ford, and last but never least, Mesache with Aaron, Peaches, and Sheppy. CHEERS!

Find at: Fab.com

By request, Lady Wine's Day Wednesday notes will be returning! But, for today, it's Sunday! The Lord's Day. So, go drink his juice! I plan on brunching and munching with my pal, Blair. I'll let you know where:)

xoxo
Her LadyMess

I felt stuck last night. Stuck in patterns, behaviors, and general wah wah's. So, I poured a glass of Jesus Juice and got on the TED website and was FLOORED at the amount of inspiration that was available at my fingertips that I had forgotten all about. Instead of coming home and losing your in television shows that won't enrich your life's purpose, come home and turn on a PODCAST or the TED talks. Never underestimate the power of learning something new to make you feel like a better human being!

 I also began the Artist's Way Creativity Cards. When I was on the road with Wicked, we used to draw angel cards once a week that gave you something to focus on - one mindful thing a week - be in setting intentions, nourishing yourself, challenging yourself... It was always such a lovely way of breeding new behaviors. So, for my birthday, I was given the Artist's Way cards and whenever I need a little inspiration, I draw a new card.

This far, I have drawn: CHANGE and EMPOWER. Each came with a little phrase reminding me I have the power of inspiration within myself.

 What do you dow hen you feel stuck?

xoxo
HerLadyMess

Recently my book club read "The Happiness Project" and by read, I mean, I was the only one who finished the book. We decided to call our club "Booze and Books" since it seems most book clubs, like ours, really get together just to have an excuse to crack a few bottles of Jesus Juice and have some LADY TIME.

(Do you think I should implement a drinking game while reading my blog? Every time I say LADY you have to take a sip of wine?? Bwahahaha. I just hope you aren't reading my blog in the morning in that event! We'll be sending you to rehab faster that Syliva's family on Intervention! If you don't know Sylvia's work, GOOGLE IT! You're welcome!)

Though I didn't find the book incredibly inspirational, I did take away a few quotes for my journal and a few good mentalities to adapt into my every days life.

Here are some quotables that inspired my day and I hope it does the same for you!

“Happiness is how, not a what. A talent, not an object.”

                   ~Gretchen Rubin

“It is by studying the little things that we attain the great art of having as little misery, and as much happiness as possible.”

                  ~Samuel Johnson

“Action seems to follow feeling, but really acting and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not.”   ~William James

“Fake it til you feel it! Act the way you want to feel.”- Gretchen Rubin

“Happiness is neither virtue no pleasure nor this thing nor that thing, but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing.”

               ~William Butler Yeats

“Whatever you admire in others is something that is nascent in yourself, but that you have not yet brought into being. Knowing what you admire in others is a wonderful mirror into your deepest, as yet unborn, self. “ -      Jungian Theory

Ah, the constant tug between striving and accepting. I’ve never figured this out, except to say that it seems a balance of necessary opposites. And yes it can be sad, while being busy and running out and fulfilling all things on my dreams/desires list I am not just accepting myself as is and letting me be me as is. I’m pushing myself. And yet if I don’t push myself I find I can be dissatisfied with things about me and my life. I figure there is a time for both pursuing and accepting.

             ~The Happiness Project

I know I spend a lot of time analyzing the looking into life and it's questions. What else are we here on this earth for? The thing that I come back to over and over is BALANCE. Nothing lasts forever - no human life, no fleeting feeling, or passing emotion... but what we want to hold onto is JOY. HAPPINESS. We all have different things that make us excited to live each day and I highly encourage you to find those things out for yourself and do them for YOURSELF. You don't need someone else to come and take your hand and show you how to live. You don't need a partner in crime to take yourself to that new place you have been wanting to eat at or to that french film playing at the local art house. Take yourself. Happiness comes from within us, not from outside of us and it is high time we worked on that relationship with OURSELVES. I have been on that band wagon since my 5 year relationship came to an end. The thing I wanted to learn and perfect was how to be with ME. Now, that is not to say that we can't enjoy our lady time or not go on to have a healthy relationship with another individual - human connection is KEY! I just think my happiness, as well as yours, has to stem from a love of self. So, cheers to that! To US!

xoxo
Her LadyMess

Loneliness Comes, Loneliness Goes

"Spending time with others is key when all you do is spend time alone. Trying to fill the days, the passing hours with things to engage your mind. It's depressing and exhausting. I've been searching for a purpose and I come up empty handed. Does anyone know my kind of loneliness? Would anyone understand it?" ~Journal Entry, MNC

"Will my life ever upgrade?" I feel like a constant mess...

I say that as an actor who tag teams doing shows, nannying, personal assisting just to make ends meet to stay in the city of my dreams. It's no easy feat and yet I am so proud of myself for MAKING it here. I had one of those "turn that frown upside down" moments in a coffee shop last week:

"My God, I am living the the life I have always wanted. the one I grew up journaling about : living in a big city, and doing what I love...  I'm sitting just as I wish with my journal at Gusto, a glass of Super Tuscan poured, and weighing the pros and cons of relationships and monogamy, life and happiness, and the empowerment of being a companion enough with myself.



Yes, loneliness comes, loneliness goes. Joy comes, and joy goes. Nothing lasts forever. Breathe and hold on during the waves and the ups and down because there is fresh air on the other side. It is the holding on long enough to get that breath that is the challenge.

xoxo
Her LadyMess

It couldn't be colder in NYC right now. New Yorkers are walking around in layers and layers of clothes and piling in to the warmest place they can think of. (For example, tonight I am going to a book club at Kashkaval. My favorite place in the city... Warm rustic feel and the only place girls should go to discuss "The Happiness Project...Oh, and drink the juice. Booze and Books. CUTE!) I myself haven't gotten out of my cuddle duds in days! (Cuddle duds...google them. You're welcome. You cannot feel a thing though these suckers. Yes, they are long underwear. No, they are not sexy, but I'm WARM! So there!). The freezing cold can put you in a funk for sure. The lack of vitamin D alone is a wah wah. How do you even attempt to feel stylish and fun in the city when it is THIS COLD. I did my best:

Gotta love a mustard head wrap!  I did have Bordeaux colored ear muffs that I swear my dog has stolen and hidden from me (that tricky tramp...). Oh well, my plan is to curl up with a Hot Toddy (what is that you say??

Recipe for MAGIC:
Hot Tea
Lemon Juice
2 shots of Whiskey or Bourbon
1 Tbls of Honey
Pinch of cinnamon
(Cloves option)

 Mix all of those together, crawl under a blanket and watch your favorite movies. It is the only way to combat the cold!

xoxo
Her LadyMess

A New Year of my Life and the New Journals Pages to go with it :)

Yes, I have a lot of questions on my mind before I commit to someone for the rest of my life. I think this is a lovely representation of "asking the questions"... I won't settle down "just because". I want to know that it is right and that I have found someone who is my partner/playmate/soulmate. I believe in love and in finding your best to share it all with.








One who inspires who or makes you feel inspirational...

Or that you BELONG in a place where you FEEL is home despite the miles apart from real family...

Heed the advice of Lawrence K. Fish: Let us all exhaust ourselves in the glorious pursuit of life!

xoxo
  Her LadyMess

Her favorite color

What's your favorite color? Little girls tend to say "pink" or "purple"... as a woman, I love that my favorite color is champagne. (I'm not much for the drink of bubbles, you know I love my juice! Something about the carbonation in it doesn't feel pleasing to me going down...) But, the COLOR! It took me a long time to realize it was my favorite... a beautiful blend of tan, cream, with an undertone of a grayish lavender. My love for it started slowly... my bell sleeved down coat (thank goodness for the bell sleeve and bottom ruching. Down coats can be unflattering and make you feel disgusting. But, not this gem. Thanks, GUESS! Their description said "Champagne"... then everything I bought was that same very color. So versatile. So classic. It all looked as expensive as the lady drinking her champagne cocktail in a window on Lexington Avenue :) After assessing my wares, I saw that with my wallet (Also GUESS), boots (Me in boots? SHOCKING, I know), and new Big Buddha Bag...



I was head to toe in champagne. What a beautiful LADY WAY to be described :)


With Lady Friend and fellow juice lover, Sara Sheperd.

XOXO
Her LadyMess

Valentine's Day

No Valentine? At least I have a fantastic collection of shoes!

Perhaps on this Valentine's Day where red paper bags and visions of wrapped flowers has made you feel you are lacking in some way, why don't you make a vow of love to YOURSELF. Here and now about how you can be better for YOU.
<3 Zumba, Ballroom, Dance classes
<3 French Lessons
<3 Monthly reading lists
<3 Meditation and mindful activities
<3 Lady lunches in support of the people who        deserve your time and energy.
<3 Hold YOURSELF accountable

XOXO
Her LadyMess